Alright, gather 'round, folks, and let me tell you about the time Mr. Knobby decided to ditch the snowmobile for a Suzuki V-Strom 650 and tackle the wilds of Thailand, Cambodia, and Laos in January 2016. Yes, January. Because what better way to escape the winter blues than by sweating through your riding gear in Southeast Asia?

Our journey began with a flight itinerary that looked like a bad math problem: BOI-SEA-ICN-BKK, 24 hours and 10 minutes of pure, unadulterated airplane seat discomfort. We landed in Bangkok at 12:10 am, two days later, feeling like we'd been tumble-dried in a lint trap. A taxi ride to the Tide Resort hotel in Chonburi was a blur of neon lights and questionable street food smells.

We had a "free day" in Chonburi, which mostly involved trying to figure out if the local market was selling actual food or just exotic-looking knick-knacks. The welcome dinner was a culinary adventure, and I'm pretty sure I ate something that was still looking at me.

Then, the riding began! I hopped on my trusty V-Strom, affectionately nicknamed "Wanderlust" (because, you know, it wanders… a lot), and we set off for Aranyaprathet. The Hotel Indochina was… interesting. Let's just say the shower was a test of my contortionist skills.

Siem Reap, Cambodia, was next. The Prince D’Angkor hotel was a welcome oasis after a long day of dodging potholes and rogue water buffalo. We explored the temples of Angkor Wat, which were absolutely breathtaking, even if I did nearly trip over a tourist while trying to take a selfie.

Stung Treng, Cambodia, was a bit more… rustic. The Golden River hotel lived up to its name, but the "golden" part was more of a yellowish-brown hue. The ride to Champasak, Laos, was a dusty affair, but The River Resort was a delightful riverside retreat. I spent most of my time trying to figure out if the Mekong River was home to actual crocodiles or just really big logs.

Thakhek, Laos, was a charming town, and the Riveria Hotel was surprisingly modern. The ride to Kong Lor was an adventure in itself, involving twisty mountain roads and villages where the chickens seemed to have the right of way. Sala Konglor/Spring River Resort was a hidden gem, nestled in a lush valley.

Vientiane, Laos, was a bustling city, and the Seasons Riverside hotel was a welcome slice of civilization. We explored the temples, markets, and tried to avoid getting run over by tuk-tuks. Vang Vieng was a backpacker paradise, and the Elephant Crossing hotel was a quirky little place with a view of the river.

Luang Prabang, Laos, was a highlight of the trip. The Maison Dala Bua hotel was a beautiful boutique hotel, and the town itself was magical. We explored the temples, visited the night market, and even took a cooking class where I managed to set a wok on fire.

Luang Namtha, Laos, was a remote town in the north. The Thoulasith Guest House was… basic. Let's just say I bonded with the geckos. The ride to Chiang Khong, Thailand, was a long one, but the Chiangkhong Teak Garden hotel was a peaceful retreat.

Ang Khang, Thailand, was a mountain paradise. The Angkhong Nature Resort was nestled in the hills, and the views were spectacular. The ride to Pai was a twisty mountain road extravaganza, and the Belle Villa Resort was a charming bungalow resort.

Finally, Chiang Mai! The Kampaeng Ngam hotel was a welcome sight after weeks on the road. We explored the city, visited the temples, and even took an elephant ride (which mostly involved me trying not to fall off).

Then, the long journey home: CNX-PEK-SEA-BOI, 26 hours and 43 minutes of pure, unadulterated airplane seat discomfort. We landed in Boise at 12:03 pm, feeling like we'd been wrung out like a wet towel.

What did I learn? Southeast Asia is a land of incredible beauty, chaotic traffic, and food that will either delight or terrify you. The Suzuki V-Strom 650 is a trusty steed, even when facing potholes the size of small craters. And most importantly, Mr. Knobby is always up for an adventure, even if it involves more questionable street food than a food critic's nightmare. Until next time, folks, keep your helmets on and your sense of humor handy!